Light in the World

As my mother's world continues to turn inward on itself, as it discards awareness and interest, my son's world seems to be cracking open, unveiling interests and abilities of which I had not dared dream.

No, I am not objective. And no, I don't think it is entirely measurable in the way that we like to measure and document such things, but his world is taking a slow, but clear outward turn that I can neither deny or explain.

He seeks out his brothers for play (excellent, new, and appropriate behavior). He joins them in their games--huge stuff, folks. Really. He follows multi-step directions (e.g. "turn down the volume, LRHF.") Wow. He cleans up his messes. He uses kleenex proactively (I will sneeze soon...let me find a tissue and hold it to my nose). Words, words, words...lots of new ones, lots of understandable ones, and lots of strung-together-in-sentences ones. Tonight, I am pretty sure that he read a word on the computer screen. Finally, I couldn't tell you the last time we had to shut that damned dutch door. Seriously. And you know that I am not a happy sunrise kind of gal about this autism beast. We've established that I lean toward glowering sunsets fading into that dark, dark night, I know, but even in this autism dark, I see his little lights glowing brighter and brighter--multiplying and shining down the path.

I know these are maybe small things to you, things your children, your students, your nieces and nephews did with an ease that defined the simplicity of the task. I know. But ohhhhh, these tiny lights, these new and beautiful things are glorious glistening gifts when they come so unexpectedly.

I don't know how or why. I don't know if it makes sense. I only know that there is more light in the world